26 October 2010

seasonal affective disorder (SAD) aka "winter depression" or "winter blues"

did you know that it's only october 26th? (BEFORE halloween?)

did you know that the first day of winter isn't until december 21st?

did you know that i am already wearing all of my warmest clothes?

did you know that i am still FREEZING?!!?

i borderline-regret everything i have ever said about always preferring to be cold instead of hot.  it is true that i greatly dislike sweating in a non-exercise situation, but i have been shivering from the cold for the past few DAYS.

and it sucks.

it's miserable and all i want to do is be in my bed at all hours which is SO not like me.  the wind is insane and i sleep in socks and a sweatsuit and underneath 2 blankets and a down comforter every night.  i'm so frustrated because i want to go out and do fun things and take advantage of living in a cool place but it's so cold that i don't want to be outside more than absolutely necessary.  UGH.  i never thought that weather alone could make you not like a place, but i'm beginning to think that it can.

i mean, i was riding the bus down from school today and the view over the water was amazing, the water had this really cool texture because of the wind and i was listening to some super hot jams and i had a really great like 4 minutes.  but then i got off the bus, literally almost got blown over, and i wanted to cry and then be wrapped in a multi-layered wool and down PARKA.

i'm not totally sure how much more i am capable of (or willing to?) bundle up; i'm already wearing my coats and boots and hats and i hate gloves, you can't use your fingers!  i refuse to dress like an eskimo anymore than i already am.  i mean, if i had wanted to be cold, i would have moved to alaska with seth.

the real world isn't so awesome today.

xo!
 

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